Today I learned that a larger portion of my worth is tied to my actions than I realized up to this point. This came clear as I looked back at my business travel last week to Las Vegas. I attended a three day conference in Vegas. Las Vegas has the absolute largest convention center I’ve experienced. Roughly nine mile a day walking through the show. Huge!
In my normal mode of operation, as I state proudly that I spend the companies money as if it were mine, I stayed at the low end hotel. In fear of getting into legal trouble I will not mention the name of the establishment, but if your interested, contact me and I’ll gladly prevent anyone from following the same path.
During this three day event I noticed what I can only describe as being crabby and irritable. Two feelings I hardly ever experience anymore. It grew until I left and started the drive to Arizona, where I was heading to spend the weekend with my Mom. I spent some time during my drive trying to figure out why I felt the way I did during the conference.
I got nothin…
Until I was starting to fill out my expense report today. It hit me…
The reason I felt like I did in Vegas was because instead of allowing my-self a good clean restful environment after long days, I allowed myself to buy into the belief of cheaper being better. Although I wasn’t aware of what this decision was saying to me about me, I made decisions based on the belief that I didn’t deserve a more expensive room ($40 more per night to be precise) and I allowed that belief to lock in even deeper, based on my false ego that I was doing it for my company…
How funny is that? I don’t get rest in order to save $40/night, so I’m not as productive as I could be, all under the premise that I’m benefiting the company.
“I am worth only what I believe I am worth”. I’ve read this so many times, in so many different books and writings, yet I put myself in rundown, beat up, loud, stinky accommodations, when I should be seeking out the best place for the situation I am in. It’s another example of me taking a belief that is beneficial in some areas and applying it across the board. I think it’s good as an employee who spends as much time as I do on the road to cut costs where possible. I would want to hire someone like that. That’s entirely different than accepting low end as a way to live life.
This lesson carries into so many other areas of my life as well… Sometimes I eat garbage food because it’s cheaper than a healthy meal. Really what I’m doing every time I make the choice for the junk is telling myself I’m not worthy of the healthy choices. This is a great example, to sink in my point!
We could write “I am worthy” a zillion point 5 times and it won’t change anything until we are willing to truly look at our actions and what we are telling ourselves through them. In manifesting, actions are so much more powerful than written &/or spoken words. So me being more aware of my actions will give me that hunch into what I’m manifesting much quicker than anything I write or talk about.
In saying all of this, I’m so grateful for being crabby in Vegas last week, because it showed me how to grow into living the life of my highest visions. It showed me how my soul envisions my life. Thank you!!